Bag

Inquisitor
Have you tried these new Purple Tablets?
Biddy
Well, I wouldn't know how brilliantly clean they get my clothes otherwise, would I?
Inquisitor
Oh. Do they? Er, well, what's so good about them then?
Biddy
They've got a bag, Geoffrey.
Inquisitor
What's that for?
Biddy
Well you don't put your shopping in it!
Inquisitor
[unsure] Right. So, how does it get your clothes clean?
Biddy
[correcting him] Brilliantly clean, Tony - I can tell you've never had children.
Inquisitor
[confused] What?
Biddy
[as if tired explaining] You put a tablet in the bag so it gets all around the wash, making the clothes brilliantly clean.
Inquisitor
So how's that different from just putting the tablets straight into the washing machine? How does surrounding the tablet in a small flimsy string bag make any difference at all to your clothes? I do not know! Explain it to me!
Biddy
You get. A bag. How many rugby shirts have you washed recently?
Inquisitor
Er... I used to play rugby...
Biddy
Oh yeah? Well they wouldn't get clothes so brilliantly clean if they were fizzing up my fanny, would they Simon?
Inquisitor
Look, what's your problem? Why are you being such an arsey bitch?
Biddy
[beat] My husband just divorced me.
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