Top Banana

Music
The Vengabus is coming,
The wheels of steel are turning,
So if you like to party,
Come on and move your body!
[continue looped instrumental bits as bed]
Roy
Hi! We are Vengaboys!
Robin
I am Robin of Vengaboys!
Roy
And I am Roy, of ...Vengaboys. We like to party!
Robin
Roy, how can we party when there exists so much misery in the world?
Roy
Shut up Robin.
Robin
Sorry Roy.
Vengababes
Hi guys!
Roy
Hey! to the Denice and to the Kim!
Robin
Our Vengababies! The busty ladies! Mega!
Denice
Hey! Where is latest leg our UK-partytour?
Robin
Denice, today student party as Vengabus arrives in University of War-wick for total party experience entitled the Top Banana! I like your hair.
Kim
The Top Banana? Wows! It has reputation stretching back even to my home country!
Denice
Home country... hmm... from where is it we actually from... come?
Roy
Don't know.
Kim
Look guys! Vengaboys arrived! This must to be the studentunion!
Denice
What an ugly building.
Roy
I'll just park the bus in this funny round car park.
Robin
Why is it got benches and big round steps?
Roy
Don't say that.
Denice
What? Steps?
Roy
<shudder>
Kim
Oh for Christ's sake. Come on. Go Vengaboys!
FX
Bus doors open, footsteps, slam.
Martin
All right?
Roy
Hi!
All
We're the Vengaboys!
Robin
We like to party!
Kim
We write the songs ourselves!
Martin
I'm Martin. I... like to... preside. I suppose.
Roy
Please direct Vengaboys to the Top Banana?
Martin
What? Top Banana is on Mondays, not Thursdays!
Denice
But tonight Vengaboys play up-your-face party for Top Banana!
Martin
I'm sorry lads, there must be some kind of booking mistake. We were expecting you on Monday, thought you had cancelled.
Kim
We had told it was Thursday! There is a lack of communications in studentunion!
Denice
So what did the Top Banana do without Vengaboys?
Martin
Oh, we just stuck a couple of cauliflowers up on poles and waved them around in front of the marketplace.
Denice
Cauliflower?!
Martin
Actually they were very successful. We're having them back next term.
Robin
Well... do you want to party anyways?
Martin
Nah, not really... there's exams and stuff coming up.
Roy
Bloody student apathy.
Come on, this Cooler Diner place looks like good. I like burger. Coming, Martin? [start to fade to distance during this bit]
Martin
[faded; only just audible] Don't be stupid. I don't want to get cancer.
Music
The Vengabus is coming!
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